Adapting to Ghana: Proverbs and Lessons for Visitors

Adapting to life in Ghana has not come overnight. Here are some of the lessons I have learned in my first six weeks here:

1) Don't walk and text.

This may seem like a pretty simple lesson. I can hear a few of you muttering, "people get hurt and worse for doing this in North America Michael, of course it will be more dangerous in Ghana." You're right, it is more dangerous, insanely so. Here are a few examples:

     Those bridges don't look sturdy...

Why yes, my shop is guarded by a moat.

There's an open manhole up ahead. 
Can't see it? Exactly my point.

It was this manhole.

Or this one.

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2) "You are never alone in Ghana" - Ghanaian Proverb

The kitchen is my battleground.

While this may sound either like a reassuring statement about how your friends and neighbors are always here to help, or some paranoid babble about stalkers and the CIA, it's actually about bugs. No, not the CIA... that's just your malaria meds talking. I meant insects. There's lots of them, they are everywhere, and they are persistent.

My roommate and I have been at war with an ant colony all week. They attack at the slightest sign of food. Everything is sealed in plastic bags or locked up in the fridge, and yet here they come... Marching in. The Ziploc on cereal was open by a sliver and the next time I grabbed for a nutritious breakfast, I almost got a double helping of pincers and protein. 

Could be worse I guess, Tamale has spiders the size of your fist and my co-worker (Alexis) has a door full of termites.

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3) You do not speak like nor hear like a Ghanaian.

This may also seem obvious. However, the degree to which you can be wrong with words and names you do in fact know is astonishing. I can't tell you how many times people have told me their names only to be greeted by a look of utter perplexion on my face as I try and decipher what on earth it could be. 

This is Joe, I got his name on the second try.

"My name is Donothone." 

"Daniel?" 

"No, J, O, N.."

"Oh, Jonas!"

(Look of exasperation).

My favourite example of this so far was when my roommate was trying to figure out what junction to get off the tro-tro at to get to our new house. 

For those of you just joining us, a tro-tro is a mini-bus crammed full of half your community and their assorted wares, and is served with delicious refreshments at every intersection. It is the public transportation of your dreams. 

She asked the mate (the guy in the bus who takes your money and destination), who said she should get off a "Pane Gwain" junction. I'll let you try and work out what that might be in English. And yes, it is English.

"Pane Gwain" Junction

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4) Your delicious roadside Jollof may come with a side of typhoid.

Doesn't look so bad right?

My Mother's last words to me before I left for Ghana were: "Remember, cook it or peel it." In hindsight, it should have also included something about bringing a sweater. It's cold here sometimes. But I digress, Ghanaian food is good, Ghanaian street food, doubly so. Now I came in thinking: "I ate through the streets of Delhi, how much worse could it be?" The answer... Much  worse.

 "I will have the ground nut stew, and please, hold the cholera."

North America is currently panicking about the outbreak of Ebola in West Africa. Accra on the other hand is trying to reign in a rapidly spreading cholera. Sanitation is difficult because of the open sewers. Typhoid, and hepatitis are also major issues for Ghana. Many Ghanaians I meet do not eat at roadside stalls for fear of getting sick. 

Since the typhoid, I have restrained my usual sense of adventure. Opting for places that instill confidence in my bowels. Like Ghana's first microbrewery, H-Street Grill!

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5) I guess it rains down in Africa - Toto

The view from my deck in Accra.

I have mentioned the rain here before. It is downright wet. As a result many Ghanaians don't go outside when it's raining (Let the record show: Portland, OR just rolled its eyes). This means that people don't really walk in the rain, or even go to work in the rain.

I am writing this post on just such a Rainday.